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It is inevitable that members of the stepfamily will compare each other against other members of the external family - the mom vs the stepmom and so on. Let those comparisons be brushed aside. If someone says "mom is a better cook that you are", then agree and say they should be proud of their mom. Don't try to compete - instead, help show how each person has their own strengths and weaknesses, and each person should be respected for being an individual.