December 6, 2002, Newsletter Issue #68: Dealing with the Ex

Tip of the Week

Being nasty and mean is rarely the answer. For one thing, it proves to your ex that you DO still care, and that he/she still has the power to hurt you. Which is a bad message to send.

For another, it`s reducing you to his/her level. Now you`re someone who can be deliberately nasty and hurtful. That`s a bad image to project of yourself, and a hard trait to live with.

In the end, your best revenge is to live well. Think of this as your chance to truly shine. Show your ex just how happy you are without him/her in your life. Show how much fun you are having, how content you are. If your ex was mean to you, show your ex just how little that affected your life and how those times have already faded into distant memory.

When you run into your ex, be casual and happy. "Oh, hi there! Nice to see you. Oh, gotta go!" and then flirt off with someone else who is obviously MUCH more interesting to you. Don`t get into a "Well, I have XXXX now" sort of argument. Any time you have to start trying to prove you`re better off, you`re risking your ex being able to dredge up some way in which he/she is better than you are. You don`t want to give your ex that luxury. Just say to your ex, "I am HAPPY!" and you decide for yourself what brings you happiness. Who cares if your ex has a new car or whatever? That`s not what makes YOU happy. What makes YOU happy is to not be near your ex, and to be living your own life!

If you do still have hard feelings towards the ex, hopefully this will help cleanse you of them. In the end, carrying resentments only really hurts the person who is nurturing those angry emotions. Just let them go. Your ex no longer matters, your ex is part of your past. Your future belongs to you.

About LifeTips

Now one of the top on-line publishers in the world, LifeTips offers tips to millions of monthly visitors. Our mission mission is to make your life smarter, better, faster and wiser. Expert writers earn dough for what they know. And exclusive sponsors in each niche topic help us make-it-all happen.

Not finding the advice and tips you need on this Relationship Tip Site? Request a Tip Now!

Guru Spotlight
Barbara Gibson