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Accept that some complaints are valid

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How to I overcome sibling rivalry?

Accept that some complaints are valid

As a parent, it is easy to dismiss the complaints of children in a sibling rivalry. Take the time to acknowledge that their complaints may be true. When there is more than one child, there *is* less individual time for each child, so the older child may be right in saying they are being paid less attention to. The younger child *is* a source that is drawing attention of the parents, and so may both be getting picked on by older siblings, or may also be tormenting older siblings in order to get more attention for himself.

Sit down with the family and, trying your best based on the ages involved, acknowledge that there is less of parents' time to go around with more children. Discuss this as a starting point, and find ways to meet your childrens' needs given this basis. In the time that *is* available, what would they like to do? What individual activities would they enjoy? Be sure to not only do things as a group, but to spend time with each child one-on-one. It is important for them to feel valuable as individuals, not just as a member of the family.

   

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Barbara Gibson