Choosing a Marriage Therapist
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Choosing a marriage therapist can be a little confusing. How do you know who to trust with something so important…something so private? Start with asking friends, family, colleagues, your doctor, or clergy person for a recommendation. Then, try two or three sessions with these points in mind.
- It is not helpful if the marriage counselor passively observes you and your spouse fighting just like you do at home. After a short period of studying your patterns, he/she should interrupt and offer suggestions for better communication.
- A good marriage therapist does not pick sides or focus on one partner as the sole cause of the marital problems. The point is to help unite you and your partner as a team to resolve key issues.
- Relationship counselors are advocates of healthy marriage. Despite times you may want to give up, your counselor should be the last one suggesting you go for divorce. (abusive marriages are an exception to this rule)
- It is not the marriage counselors job to tell you whether you should stay married or get divorced. This is your choice as a couple
It is important that you are comfortable with whomever you choose. If your instincts are screaming to notify you that the person is not being helpful, keep shopping.